From Where the Sun Now Stands, I Will Blog-whore No More, Forever
For those unfamiliar with the term, "blog-whoring" is when you post an entry to your blog that will, in your dispassionate opinion, quite likely change the course of human history if only enough other people get a chance to read it. For humanity's sake, you feel compelled to communicate with other blog-owners -- usually those with much larger readerships than your own -- to try to convey to them the urgent necessity of placing a link in their blog to the item you've just written. I mean, come on. What we are talking about here is the survival of the human race.
Okay, that's one way of describing blog-whoring. Another one might be: peddling your blog's ass all over town.
Yes, I've blog-whored myself. I always tell myself I won't do it anymore, but then... well, I mean, after all... when you have written something that will cause humanity to throw off its chains, or banish darkness from its heart, or, you know, stop using so many plastic shopping bags, what are you supposed to do? Abandon your obligations to your fellow man?
Still, when I do it, I feel dirty afterward and always regret doing it. Partly this is because I am naturally demure and retiring, as you all well know, and partly this is because, so far, the entries I had assumed would change the course of human history turned out to be somewhat less than staggering in their insights or -- a thousand times worse -- the jokes weren't as funny as I thought they were.
So! Never again!
If you own a blog and I seductively wave one of my entries in your general direction, kindly avert your eyes. I don't want to do it. It's a disease, not a moral failing. Nevertheless, I know it is my responsibility to overcome it, not yours. All I ask is a little compassion. And, you know, maybe you could permanently block my email address.